Adoption Article Gone Awry

I am extremely disappointed with Adrianne Stone-Gibilisco’s adoption article (“Adoption Gone Awry,” January 2009). Many of the author’s statements are extremely negative towards adoption. I have a son who is adopted and he is the greatest blessing. Adoption is not a “good deed.” One never knows how a child will turn out; we need to hope for the best and provide love, kindness, and do the best we can as parents. A family is a family and it doesn’t and shouldn’t matter how it was formed, whether through biology or adoption. It is disheartening to read such a negative article.

Staci Stone

Adoption Gone Awry” was, at best, irresponsibly reported and researched, and, at its worst, condescending and offensive.

Let’s begin with the opening anecdote from 1959—it is outdated and says nothing about the state of adoption today. I can only conclude it is meant to cause readers to react in horror and frighten prospective adoptive parents. The experts consulted and relied upon quite heavily in this piece are skewed as sources. Their patients are self-selecting, i.e., they only see adoptive children with problems. I have never heard of Katie Liebenberg—is she qualified to speak on this topic?

Genes and perceived “predispositions” guarantee nothing; parenting, biological or adopted, comes with zero guarantees. And adoption is not “the most selfless act of love.” Anyone who is actually familiar with adoption knows that an adopted child is just that, a child and the greatest gift in one’s life, like any child. We have two beautiful, bright, utterly wonderful children who are adopted from China. They will face the same risks in life and the same challenges that all children face. 

Bethany Durkin

What were you thinking when you published “Adoption Gone Awry?” The article is an affront to the adoption community.

Adoption is not a “selfless act of love” or charity. We are not following Angelina Jolie but are trying to form families, which are not always perfect. No, adoption is not perfect, but the issues of adopted children have been researched and documented by numerous experts in the field, none of whom were interviewed for this vacuous article. On behalf of the Adoptive Parents Committee, of which I am a board member, and the thousands of adoptive family memberships, we are deeply disappointed that Westchester Magazine, typically featuring solid editorial content, would run such a travesty. 

Rich Mintzer
Adoptive parent and author of Yes, You Can Adopt 
Mount Kisco

Crowing for the Croton Aqueduct

Your interesting feature on National Historic Landmarks in the county omitted the Old Croton Aqueduct. The Aqueduct received this designation in 1992, on the 150th anniversary of its opening. Three of the landmarks you picture border the trail atop the Aqueduct, while three others are a short walk from it. The 26-mile part of the Aqueduct in Westchester is now a treasured recreational path linking the rivertowns.

Readers may be interested in the color map and guide published by the Friends of the Old Croton Aqueduct (914-693-4117).

Charlotte Fahn

Editor’s Note: We’ve added the Croton Aqueduct (and a few others we missed!) to our online version of the story.

Luv Frugal Living

My January issue just arrived, and I’m taking a gander at your voluminous, info-packed “A Guide to Frugal Living.” I really liked the part of your feature telling us how to get the benefits of the pricey skincare items with less expensive, still-effective ones. Well done!

Linda L. Martin
Westchester Medical Group
White Plains

Oops: In the article “Antiquing in Westchester” in the January issue, Antiques & Consignments Shop on the Square in Tuckahoe was incorrectly listed as a thrift shop. It is a consignment shop.

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