Diamonds Are Forever

By Daniel Isenberg

The first step in the whole process of getting hitched is going shopping for the engagement ring. Dana and I knew when we moved in together that we wanted to get married, and she was very excited about looking for an engagement ring. I didn't mind because I truly knew nothing about diamonds or engagement rings before, so we started shopping, TOGETHER.

Something to know about my fiancé: SHE IS A MAJOR SHOPPER. I've been the guy twiddling with his cell phone in the corner of J. Crew for an hour (while she peruses every garment on every rack in the store and then tries on two dozen of her favorites in the dressing room) enough times with her to know that this wasn't going to be a quick and breezy experience. Still I was enthusiastic about it, because I love her and I wanted her to have a fly engagement ring that she was crazy about.

We went to NUMEROUS STORES, from Tiffany's in Greenwich (where I almost had my first heart attack) to some local hole in the wall jewelry store in Mamaroneck (it was still pushing Casio watches like they were hot items), and everywhere in between. Here's what I learned.

1. The 3 Cs, or is it 4 Cs? Whatever the case, those Cs are important. Don't remember them now, but at the time I had them down pat; kind of like high school math - I knew it well then but can't remember it now. I think they are COLOR, CUT, and CLARITY. The fourth doesn't start with a C, but it's very very important: SIZE. And the SHAPE is important too; there's round, square, pear. FORTUNATELY Dana knew she wanted a round diamond. Oh, did I mention that each C has its own weird scale with all sorts of letters and numbers?

2. The GIA certificate, which insures that the diamond is real, and not fake, or to quote Donnie Brasco, a fugazi. You gotta make sure they have the GIA certificate.

3. The setting. There are lots of different weird, exotic, gaudy, totally gnarly looking settings that luckily Dana thought were WACK. She wanted something simple, but NOT TOO SIMPLE. She wanted what I think is called a channel setting, which basically means a band that has little diamonds in it. I actually liked it like that, and it didn't seem to cost much more. Oh, and the prongs. Four or Six. She liked four. I agreed.

Now that I knew what Dana wanted, she cut out of the process. We had done enough research, and now she had to let me take over and finish the job. I mean, what did she want to do, propose to herself while I sat in the corner twiddling with my cell phone?

In the end, after going to meet with a couple jewelers on my own, I found the perfect diamond. It was a more than ample size, the cut, color, and clarity were excellent, and the jeweler custom made the setting to Dana’s specifications. The diamond itself was a bit out of my range, but it it gave me that mushy feeling, so I figured out how to pay for it comfortably and copped it. I'm not a guy who likes to drive fancy cars or wear fancy clothes, so I can afford to give my woman a beautiful engagement ring that she will wear for the rest of her life. And I'll be paying the bill for it for the rest of my life!